I’m done with the annual ritual of body shaming that has become an integral part of Christmas like tinsel and turkey. I’m done with the inevitable conversations about what we can or can’t eat, and the knowing looks exchanged between loved ones when they comment on who has gained or lost weight. I’m tired of the way these conversations resonate across generations, teaching young girls that their bodies are something to watch over and that tasty foods are actually bittersweet – laden with guilt.

The statistics tell a devastating story. According to Girlguiding 2023 reportAn alarming figure: 68% of girls aged 11 to 21 want to lose weight, and almost half admit to skipping meals to lose weight – an increase of 15% since 2018. We have normalized this suffering so completely that Psychologists have come up with a term for it: normative discontent, the expected state of women being eternally unhappy with their bodies.

The holiday season amplifies this discord. Between family members who think body comments are casual conversation and the looming wave of New Year’s weight loss messages, the festive months become a minefield of shame. And while diet culture may have traded its obvious phobia of fat for smiling promises of “wellness” and “self-care,” the message remains the same: your body needs repair.

What if we chose differently? What if, instead of entering a new year of self-criticism, we committed to creating sanctuaries for ourselves and others? Even if the problem seems too huge to solve, it has been proven that we have the power to make a difference for each other in our daily conversations and interactions. As friends, mothers, sisters, aunts, we all have an influence in each other’s lives. Every time we apologize for our appearance, ridicule our bodies, or greet ourselves with comments about weight instead of auras or accomplishments, we reinforce the idea that beauty is our primary value. We can choose different table topics, create different measures of value, and show younger generations that their body is the least interesting thing about them.

This transformation isn’t just personal: it’s political, it’s part of a broader movement to dismantle the societal pressures that dictate women’s relationships with their bodies. As we move forward, we can be more attentive to how these conversations about bodies arise, and when they arise, we can quickly put them aside.

I began this journey by redirecting my energy toward joy. I traded my punishing workout routines for community Zumba classes, where the pleasure of generations of women dancing and wiggling together drowns out any thoughts about my appearance. I am learning to eat until I am full, to enjoy the pleasure of good meals shared with my loved ones without measuring the cost in calories or guilt.

Changes can start small. Eat it Christmas chocolates. Allow yourself to be comfortable, tune in to what makes you happy, be kind to other women, and start creating a nourishing and delicious life. Move your body for pleasure, not to punish yourself. When negative thoughts or comments arise, redirect them into gratitude for what your body allows you to do: hug, dance, create, live. Research shows that this simple change in perspective creates a powerful buffer against any future self-criticism.

This holiday season, I’m making a different kind of resolution. Instead of planning how to shrink myself in the new year, I’m expanding my capacity for joy. I choose to see my body not as an obstacle to overcome but as my way of experiencing the pleasures of life. I am learning that taking up space is not a sin, it is a sign that I am fully present in my life. This is not an easy task, but it is crucial.

So, to all the women who have spent too many vacations at war with themselves: we deserve better. This ChristmasI’m done making fun of my body. Instead, I nurture it, celebrate it, and use my influence to uplift other women. So, let’s make a pact: this Christmas, let’s leave shameful speech, guilt and restrictive mentalities behind us. Let’s commit to a healthier, kinder and more inclusive future, full of liberation, laughter and self-love in its truest sense. Let’s decide to rebirth the inner girl in a world where she is enough and worthy of so much more.

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