Dear Annie:

I met this guy who seems to be my soul mate. He lives in America and I am in South Africa. However, he refuses to meet me and says it’s because he’s a celebrity.

He is manipulative and constantly makes me cry. He wants me to send him money before we meet, but since I can’t – I just don’t have the funds he requested – he hasn’t spoken to me in almost three weeks now. He sulks and generally acts like a child.

I love this man, but I don’t like this behavior. We are both adults and should act as such. He said before we stopped talking that I had to send him $8,000, which he knows full well is unrealistic. I’m at the end of my tether. Can you please advise? — Used and upset

Dear used and upset:

As much as you think you “love” this man, you know better than anyone that this relationship is a scam. If he really cared about you, he wouldn’t make you cry or give you the silent treatment, let alone ask you for thousands of dollars. I only see red flags here, and I’m sure you do too. Stop it immediately.

“How can I forgive my cheating partner? » is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology – featuring her favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation – is available in paperback and e-book form. Visit for more information. Send your questions to Annie Lane at [email protected].

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