Last year, when Lauren Haydel began her first holiday season sober, she wondered how difficult it would be to avoid alcohol at family parties and celebrations with friends. She owns a boutique, Fleurty Girl, in the French Quarter of New Orleans, a neighborhood synonymous with drinking.

But few people questioned his choice. “Instead of asking me why,” Haydel says, “they ask me, ‘Oh, do you feel better?'”

Many friends told him they were considering avoiding alcohol themselves.

Sobriety is having a moment, says Jessica Jeboult, founder of the site and online community A Sober Girl’s Guide.

“This is the ultimate time to rediscover or change your relationship with alcohol,” she says. With so many alcohol-free products available and increasingly aware of the benefits of remaining sober, “there is maximum support”.

If you’re considering staying sober this holiday season, here’s advice from sober coaches, sober bar managers, and happily sober people:

Plan Your Drink Options Before Social Events

“Having something in your hand just increases your comfort level, because you feel like you’re socializing with that item in your hand, instead of standing there with your hands at your side,” says Abby Ehmann, owner of Hekate Cafe and Elixir Lounge. , a low-key bar on New York’s Lower East Side.

It can be helpful to choose your alcohol-free options in advance. If you prefer something that reminds you of alcohol, sample some of the many non-alcoholic wines and beers available on the market (not all are equally tasty) and check which ones are on the menu at a bar or restaurant. restaurant you will visit. .

If you’re hosting a party or attending at someone’s home, you can also make your own mocktail recipes in advance.

“Treat these drinks like they’re really special,” says Vermont-based chef Suzanne Podhaizer, who mixes an assortment of mocktails when she entertains.

Don’t forget the garnish, she says: “Consider putting a sugar rim on your glasses or using luster powder on top.” The more festive you make non-alcoholic drinks, the more people will feel good.

Mocktails also make great hostess gifts. Mix up a batch of your favorite recipe, pour it into a large mason jar, and tie it with a ribbon to take with you.

Make social plans that don’t focus on drinking

This year, plan to meet somewhere other than a bar. It’s the perfect season “to grab some delicious hot chocolate, take it outside and go ice skating,” says Kate Baily, UK women’s health coach and podcast host. Sober love.

If you’re invited to a drinking event, give yourself permission to avoid it, says Adam Cannon, a Pittsburgh real estate agent who has been sober for 18 years.

In his industry, “this time of year, there’s a different networking event every night of the week,” Cannon says. He chooses not to go if “apparently it’s about networking, but it’s at a bar.” People are getting hammered.

Know your sober social window

Even if you’re used to staying out late, “you don’t have to do what you’ve always done at this particular Christmas party,” says Haydel. Get through the first hour, then allow yourself to leave whenever you want.

You won’t miss much. “There’s a magic hour when you’re at a bar or drinking with friends,” Jeboult says. “When people go beyond two or three drinks, the stories are the same.”

If necessary, leave without explanation. Whether you call it a “French exit” or an “Irish goodbye,” it’s totally an option.

Take breaks and connect with sober support

If you’re feeling stressed during a holiday get-together, “take a break,” Jeboult advises. Escape to the bathroom, step outside for a minute, or go for a walk.

Snack breaks are also helpful. Jay Bridwell, a recovery counselor at Red Rock Behavioral Health in Oklahoma City, often uses the acronym HALT with patients in rehab. If you’re “hungry, angry, lonely or tired,” he says, you may be more likely to consume alcohol. So allow time for rest and meals.

And have a plan if things get difficult. Whether it’s an Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor, a sober parent, or a group message with healthy friends, stay in touch with people who will support you, Bridwell says. You can also join an online sobriety group and follow sobriety-related social media accounts.

Plan your transportation

Plan multiple transportation options, rather than relying on just one person to get you home after a party. You’ll be less stressed and feel less motivated to temper stress with alcohol if you have the freedom to leave whenever you want.

Consider Sobriety as a Holiday Gift to Yourself

During her first sober holiday season last year, Haydel reveled in meaningful conversations and the joy of waking up refreshed each morning with clear memories of the night before.

“Sobriety is the gift you continue to give to your future self, over and over again,” says Eliott Edge, who runs Hekate, the sober bar.

Focus on this very real gift, says Baily. Take your time getting dressed, visualize yourself having a good time, and imagine how it will feel when your head hits the pillow when you get home.

Finally, plan a reward for the next day. Maybe breakfast with a friend or a morning walk in the park will do you good because you won’t have a hangover.

“You have the best time of the evening,” Baily says, “and there’s no cost.”